Entry: ~ Freaky Friday ~ Friday, January 14, 2005



 FreAKy FRidAy

   Last day of the working days of the 2nd week of the 1st month of the year 2005...sigh...why is that I can't think right these past few days most especially this week...I believed I have given up to God my everything and all...sigh... my job is getting so confusing and it really made me to feel - I don't want to go to work today again - ...oh noh! I don't want to feel that this is another passing day with this job. For sure I miss talking to the Aussie's and that I love talking to them but then why is that I don't feel happy in doing it anymore?... when I am doing it for almost a couple of years now? Did I already feel so fed up with these that I almost do the same routine almost everyday? Sigh, could somebody hear me out on this....

   My supervisor talked to me about being absent for a couple of days...she advised me that I ruined the operation...sigh...on the very first place I am so vocal to them about my plans of moving out of the company and that I already made up my mind that sooner or later of this month I'll be filing my resignation....and now they are asking more of my time to be on the floor....I know for sure that I am one of the best agent that they got and I am the most versatile among the agents on the floor but I'm not playing hard to get so that they would be in struggle and made the operation in disarray....sigh...why should I do that in the first place?

   I went to another company this morning (prior to the talk my supervisor and me have later this afternoon) to submit my resume' yet was then told that they will be ringing me for the interview...Oh God! Be upon me and let thy will prevail in anyway that I'll be doing...Lord, you know that I cannot do this without you on my side...I'm lifting this up to YOU.....

   Went to the head office afterwards and done as quickly as possible the request elevated to me...I was about to proceed to my office when I met this person that I have been ignoring for the longest possible time (he is my officemate)....sigh....he offered me a ride going there and I cannot say no since he knew for the fact that I am going there....Oh no God! I know this man has been a very persistent suitor of mine since last year...sigh... I do not dislike him but I am not ready at all to have another relationship for the meantime...for sure I am totally healed when my fiancé' passed away just recently and that I already giving up dating.... ~I kissed dating goodbye.... On the way to the office I always engaged my self in conversing with him about this and that just to kill the in-between silence...LOL...I have been praying that there would be no traffic and that We could arrive the office ASAP .... Goodness grace he talked and always gave a hint about his intention of pursuing courting...I was laughing inside of me because I always win over him to steered away the conversation into a different topic which he didn't taken notice of..LOL…. thank you Lord that you made me so bubbly that I could handle this kind of conversation so well...LOL...I was indeed so glad at last we arrived...I gave a sigh of relief and advised that I need to go ahead...Oh God! not this man please spare me on this.....LOL...indeed a very ~Freaky Friday, HUH~.....

   Dear God, it was not hidden from you what is inside of me that I already prayed and asked about this person.... SIGH ....... That I have learned to love this friend of mine in silence .... I cannot voice this out on him and I don't have the courage to and I have no plans at all .... sigh ...he has a girlfriend though...and he loved her so much...and both of them are so dear to me....I don't feel jealous about her and that is entirely so weird of me...because I know for a fact that I cannot just moved in the middle of them and I cannot win him over...so please Lord if this feeling was not from you and would do me no good and was not meant to be.. Please I'm begging you to please take this away from me and if we are meant to be Lord...let this stay and ~Patiently I'll Wait~ for that love inside of him for me to be awaken in due time...in Your time.... In Your Perfect Time ...

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